Monday, August 18, 2008

Day 44

I can't look at that without laughing

Line of the Week: As far as reactions go, cunt is just the pussy version of nigger.

To be honest, I haven't really been doing much as of late besides watch The Olympics all day long. This shit is addicting and it figures that they would put the stuff I really love watching like Gymnastics, Women's Volleyball(Kerry Walsh and Misty Mays!) and Diving at the beginning to get me hooked, so lets talk about that.

The gymnasts this year have been all over the place, with China taking most of the medals. The Chinese gymnasts are soo small; they're adorable. It almost makes you want to start an international corporation so you could own a sweat shop full of them! If only...

On the opposite side though, Norway's Women's Beach Volleyball team is fucking ugly. Every girl I've ever met from Norway has been at LEAST a 6.5, but those chicks are like 4.5s at best, and that means the cons outweigh the pros...what the fuck?. Maybe Norway should stick to models and winter sports. Belgium however, really raised the bar in the looks department...yummy.

I went to Jack in the Box sometime this week and I ednde up going through the drive-thru, getting stuck behind a white car with not one, not two, but three fat fucks in it. I was going to assume they were ordering for their family back home, but I guess that's just my optimism showing...

Anyways, so they pay and they get there food and instead of moving, they all start looking around, talking to eachother and then tell the Jack in the Box employee for something. A moment later, some guy who works there comes outside and begins to push the car. That's right folks, these three, count 'em, one, two and three, fat motherfuckers were too fat and lazy to get out of their own car and push it. Instead, they opted to ask an employee, who's actually doing his fucking job mind you, to come outside and push 500 pounds of ugly...and the car. This is why people like me should own flamethrowers, RPGs and shotguns...I'll take care of this obesity problem REAL quick.

I wentt to Memorial Mall and didn't find out it why it was so packed until I got inside and I realized it was Tax Free Weekend. At this point, I'm reaching in my pocket to make sure I have something sharp to defend myself against those people; I'll let you fill in that blank with whatever helps you sleep at night. I'm not saying that there were too many people who needed to focus more on the amount of textiles used in making their clothes than the amount of clothes they had, but that maybe there really needs to be a weight limit to get into a fucking mall. I couldn't even walk straight for two reasons, 1) Fat people couldn't "step lively" if there lives depended on it and 2) they are apparently just getting wider, taking me, and I counted, at least three extra steps to get around them. That's three more steps I need to take, just to move around these beached whales we've got rolling around.

Similarly, I propose a new law. There should be a limit to the amount of materials used to make swim suits, tank tops and other summer-related and revealing clothing. That means no XL, XXL or more, you're either a small, medium or a large and that's it. If you don't fit in the clothes created then it's a sweater and fat pants for you, at least until you sweat that weight off or die from heat exhaustion. Fucking fatties make me mad....I'm mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore!

I'll (angrily) leave you with one of the coolest and most realistic home made videos I've ever seen:

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